Morning by morning, new mercies I see

“Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see;
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided—
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!…” — Great Is Thy Faithfulness hymn

This hymn came to mind this morning when I saw this gorgeous sky.  I just love those words, that each morning, there will be new mercies.  It is a definitely a comfort to me as we are starting our second year of grieving the loss of my husband.

And, the words that continue, “all I have needed, thy hand hath provided.”  These are true.  As hard as it’s been and as mad as I have sometimes been, what we have needed has been there.  People have helped us and we have been okay.  And, frankly, that has felt like a miracle at times.

I still don’t understand the why of this, I find myself with many questions and anger at times, and I realize that I may never the get answers that I want.  But God is still faithful and is still a comfort.  Truly, the mix of good and bad is being felt and helped, but without all of the answers.

I also read this week an amazing post about grief and how the waves change over time but keep coming.  I have found this to be true.  I am not stopped or gutted each day like I was at the beginning.  That is good since life has a tendency to move on, despite what we may be feeling like.

Now it hits me at random times.  Like yesterday, I was very sad after taking my son to school.  I came home to try and work but found I couldn’t.  So I took time with my breakfast, watched some TV, and ended up taking a 2 hour nap.  I then woke up, read, and later had lunch prior to having my son come home from school.

I later helped him with his homework, we had a good dinner, and I fell asleep on the couch.  Clearly I was tired and needed the extra rest.  I prayed a bit for comfort and thought of my loved one who is gone.  And, I cried a little as well.

Then this morning, I felt better and then was blessed with this amazing sunrise.  So, mercy was truly there for me.  What an amazing feeling that is.  And as crazy as it sounds, it felt like a message from my loved one that he is okay.  And, a result, we are also okay.  Cue the tears, right?!

We continue to struggle at times since we never know what a new morning will bring.  But we are trying to settle back into our routine.  Right now, we are both a bit tired.  Ian’s school starts really early so that means early wake up times.  As a result, we are supposed to have early bedtimes, but those don’t always happen.

My prayer is that we may have continued mercy, that we be blessed with many more new mornings, and that we continue to appreciate all of the times that we had with my husband.  He was an amazing blessing in our lives and all who knew and loved him.  He continues to be missed, loved, and fondly remembered.

Prayers for you as well.  If you are grieving, may you have comfort.  If you are sick, may you be healed.  If you are sad, may you find a reason to smile.  If you are struggling, may you find the help that you need.

May we continue to be there for one another.  May we live with kindness and grace.  And, may we always, always love.