Today I Want To Cry

SANYO DIGITAL CAMERAEver have one of those days when all you want to do is have a good cry, sit under a blanket, and shut out the problems of the world?  I am having one of those today.  But, there is not time to sit under the blanket.  Instead I have to keep moving forward since this is a busy week.  But, my mind still wanders and my heart is heavy.

I normally love watching the news in the morning and evenings.  That has been my thing for years.  Each morning, I have listened, learned, and laughed with the people on our local news channel and then “Good Morning America.”

But now it’s just too hard to listen and watch.  There are so many stories that I don’t want Ian to hear about without the chance to discuss them with him.  Deaths, bombs, shootings, kidnappings, terrorists, and the list goes on.  Since we don’t want Ian seeing too much of all of that, my routine has changed drastically.  Kirk and I want to be the ones who decide how much he sees and hears.  And, to listen to his questions and concerns and be honest with our responses.

Also, the hatefulness and continued inaction between Congress and the current President is getting tedious.  Why can’t they find a way to work together as happened back when Tip O’Neal was Speaker of the House and Ronald Reagan was President?  These two men were on opposite sides of most issues, but still managed to find a way to work together.  It seems that those who supposedly care about America would be doing more to make things better.  And actually do the work that it takes.

Also, the shenanigans of the presidential candidates has been hard to watch. They are mean to one another both within their own party and the other party.  They are also mean to the American people. I know they are opponents but could we show some decency?  What ever happened to agreeing to disagree?  Or to listening to and learning from someone else?  Or having a healthy debate but remaining respectful of your opponents?  It’s going to be a long year.

And, then this morning I found out that a dear friend of ours who is 7 years old will soon be starting chemotherapy and radiation for his brain tumor.  We knew this was coming and it is good, yet hard to deal with.  He recently had two surgeries to remove the brain tumor.  He is the sweetest boy and a friend of Ian’s.  My heart goes out for him and his family as he begins this journey.

For now, we wait and hope and pray.  It will be a tough battle but this boy is strong and has an amazing support system.  For that I am very thankful.  And, knowing this helps.  We also have other friends and family who are sick, or dealing with the deaths of loved ones.  With the holidays coming up, all of these things can sometimes be harder to deal with.  May we be a support to one another by being there, loving each other, and showing some kindness.  And may we pray for one another.

With so much darkness in the world, I don’t want Ian growing up thinking that it’s okay to be cruel and mean to someone who doesn’t agree with him.  I don’t want him thinking that giving up and not trying are okay.  Instead I want him to know there is still decency in the world, as well as kindness and love.  And, I want him to know that it is important to always do his best and to work hard.

And although there are obstacles in life and sickness, hope still exists and so does the power of prayer and faith.  Ian is learning about that from our church and the Bible.  He is more aware of many things than I like to sometimes admit.  He is an amazing little boy who teaches me things every day.

A few silver linings are my son’s innocence and joy of life, my faith, my friends, my family, my routine, and laughter with friends and family.  And, funny shows, people, and movies also help.  As Truvy said in Steel Magnolias, “laughter through tears is my favorite emotion.”  I hope to find that laughter, whether there are tears or not.

Now that I have written all of this, I feel the weight lifting and my heart feels less heavy. Sometimes it helps to just get it out, as with a good cry.  May you have a blessed day.  If you too are feeling sad, remember there are those there to help you and faith is an amazing comfort.  God bless!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s